relationship violence

Relationship violence may be distinguished: verbal emotional abuse , Physical abuse and sexual abuse. pg 270. An example of emotional abuse would be the Maury show. I know a lot of people watch the show. Sometime their are women on the show who are emotional abuse. Their lover talks to them any kind of way, make them have low self esteem and make them feel like they are worth nothing. Both me and women get emotional abuse. Physical abuse is one of the bigger issues in America today. Women die or get real hurt with physical abuse. I know someone who gets abuse but they never go to the police. They feel like there is no way out but it is. Hopefully that person comes to their senses before it is to late. some people think that a relationship is suppose to be that way. I never been in that type of that situation and if I feel like it is getting to that point I would leave but that is my opinion. What is yours?http://www.dailymotion.com/video/x24kfp_stop-emotional-abuse-celebrate-the_family

Culture and eye communcation

Eye communication is very important to me. As an American we see eye communication a sign of respect. The first thing they teach us is if you are going on an interview make sure you give great eye contact. By looking away it shows that you are afraid and might not be able to handle the job. For other cultures eye communication has a different meaning. For example in in some cultures looking away is a sign of respect. If you give that person eye contact, that means you have no respect for them. Many countries have their own meaning for eye communication. To us their way might seem bad but that is in their culture. I always look a person in the eyes. That is how I communicate my point across. Even if you are telling a lie. You always look that person in the eye to make it believable. I do it all the time and it seems to work. Not saying it is a good thing to do but eye communication helps you out in many situations.http://www.rikkinyman.com/training/japanese_culture/communication.htm

power plays

What is a power play? Power play are patterns of behavior that are used repeatably by one person to take unfair advantage of another person. pg315. There are three types. They are called nobody upstairs, you owe me and yougottobekidding. Everyone uses these power plays. An example of nobody upstairs would be me asking my boyfriend about going to the movies everyday and he never response and finally he says yes. An example of you owe me is my aunt always is willing to help people but she wants something in return. She never does it from her heart. She will through it in your face. An example of yougottabekidding me would be when I tell my sister about a situation and she would say for real. For real is like saying yougottabekidding me. It makes it seems like she is not taking me serious. Power plays are a way of life. You may not know you are doing one but you are. What is your play?http://www.ministryhealth.net/mh_articles/153_42_power_plays.html

Facebook

I use facebook. It is a great way to network,reunite and keep in touch with family and friends. Facebook is one major way of communication. Network convergence occurs: that is a relationship between two people develops, they begin to share their network of other communicators with each other.pg 252. Facebook is very useful to me. My bestfriend and I are distant. He lives in Florida. So when I check on facebook, It makes me feel like we see each other because he has his pictures up of what's going on in his everyday life. Sometimes it feels like I am their and it is the same with him. Even though we talk on the phone, facebook gives us some type closeness. An another example would be I have not seen my cousin in years. We found each other on facebook and he was able to help me in my math homework. Technology plays a big role in society. You can even meet your lover and develop new relationships online. I am glad that I use facebook because without it I would not meet half of the people I know. http://www.facebook.com/facebook?ref=pf

win lose and win win strategies

How many people avoid situation that they have to deal with? I do it a lot. When I am auguring with someone or telling a lie. One strategy if avoidance. Avoidance of conflict may involve actual physical flight.pg 288. For example when I am telling a lie and I get caught in it, I tend to walk away because my facial expression will let him know I am lieng.When I am arguing with someone, I also walk off because if i stay it will only make matters worse. Sometimes I leave so I can cool off. Meaning I need time to myself. I also use force and talk strategies. When I argue and want to be right, I get very emotional and cry so I can win. It seems to work every time. What are your strategies?http://tnl3000.com/conflictincommunication.aspx

Gunnysacking

What is gunnysacking? It sounds like it should not be a word but it is. Gunnysacking is the practice of storing up grievances so they may be unloaded at another time.pg 284 My sister for example gunnysackes a lot. She is very quiet and when something is bothering her she tends to hold it in. Her and my oldest sister currently are living together. you can call my oldest sister the youngest. My middle sister never says anything when the bills are unpaided. She takes up the slack from the oldest sister when she does not pay the bill. I know she gets mad at times but she never shows it. This has happened more than once. What the middle sister does is let it build up over time and then have a break down. To avoid gunnysacking, she should have said something in the beginning to she wouldn't have all this pressure build up inside of her because she ran herself crazy.http://www.blogger.com/www.wfu.edu/~louden/Interpersonal/IPC%20Materials/Defensive%20Communication.ppt

Conflict

How many have ever had a disagreement with someone they know? Everyone has. Interpersonal conflict is disagreement between or among connected individuals who perceive their goals as incompatible.pg. 276. I have had many conflicts with different people. What I mean by different people is with my best friend, partner, and family member. Conflicts can occur in different types of relationships. For example, My sister and I had an argument on paying the bills. I felt she was wrong because I was only seventeen, still in high school and she wanted me to pay bills. I felt she was being unfair to me. So I left the house for a couple of days to cool off. After that she called and everything was resolved. People have conflicts. To me it is normal because without conflicts, how will we solve anything. People have to disagree in order to agree. If everyone agreed a ot of things would not be discovered or better. Things would remain the same.Having conflicts is always a good thing in my book.http://www.abacon.com/commstudies/interpersonal/inconflict.html